10.28.2009

A journey...

Do you ever just sit back and think for a minute.



I have.....about my relationship with my daughter. You see...we are so eerily similar in so many ways.



We are both so stubborn and hard headed....that sometimes....i have to take a step back just to see that



she is me.



This girl...is me.



Now granted....i don't think i ever took scissors to my hair...because....well.....



err..



and i never said to my mom...your the worst mom ever...



nope...never ever ever said that.



Oh...and i never packed my suitcase and threatened to walk out the front door...



nope.never.



well.....see....i might have done that when i was little......



and that just proves my point that my little girl is me.



We all have struggles....we all have balances......



and i'm just trying to find mine.



ours.



a balance.




When i was talking with a friend the other day...she told me...do you realize how absolutely private you are...about your life...even to your closest friends.



She's right.



I am SO private...yet so open.



I can talk freely about my life in doses and give you glimpses....the same i would a friend.



She then told me that even your closest friend should know all the deep down dirt so that they can in fact be a real friend.



I only have one friend that knows the deep...the dirty...the ugly.



My mom.



Not that there is much dirt.....or much ugly...



but there was some...



and my mom is still my closest go to girl.



I want that with my daughter.....



I want her to be open with me....but i still want to be a parent.



I think we all go through challenging phases in parenting....



otherwise...i wouldn't think you were normal...



I think parenting girls is so hard....and i truly hope that it will



be as rewarding ....



as my relationship with my mom.









I decided to ask lola to share with you her all time favorite book.



{She thought that was pretty cool that i asked her opinion....



and that i was going to share this with you....}







It's called 'The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane'.



She.....i mean ....WE.....love this book.



It's about a little toy rabbit that is lost...only to find his way home....after a long journey.



I.love.this.book



You will love this book......



as for me...i just picked up Julia Childs cookbook.......yup....



now you won't see me doing a recipe a day....



oh..



no..



you..



won't...



but i did make a promise with myself....



that i'm going to try and make a better home .....



and by that...



i need to start cooking a wee bit more.



Not that mac n cheese is so bad...



but my hubby did say....



I really loved it when you made those rotisserie chicken enchilada's....



and i really loved that



apple crisp.














Anyhoo....


that's a bit about me....


getting a little deep there.


oh....and since you asked about the recipe....












Heart Attack apple crisp:



apple filling



* 8 oz unsalted butter {2 sticks}



* 8 granny smith apples, peeled,cored and sliced



* 4 tsp fresh lemon juice



* 1 tsp grated fresh ginger



* 1 c. light brown sugar {packed}



* 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon



*4 tbsp flour






cobbler topping



* 1/2 c light brown sugar



* 1 c. all-purpose flour



* 1/2 tsp cinnamon



* 1/2 c quick oatmeal



* 1/8 tsp salt



* 8 oz. unsalted butter {2 sticks}






Prepare



Preheat over to 350.



Filling: melt butter in large saute pan on med heat. add apples and saute briefly. add lemon juice, ginger,brown sugar and cinnamon. Blend mixture to incorporate all ingredients. sprinkle flour over mixture and blend well.



cook for about 5 minutes stirring occasionally. let cool.



Topping: in a mixing bowl blend all the topping ingredients except butter until evenly mixed. Cut pieces of butter into mixture until just crumbly.



Assemble: Place cooled apple filling into shallow baking dish. Sprinkle cobbler mixture over top.



bake about 30 minutes till lightly brown on top.



serve warm.



Now...



I cut out one stick from each ...the mixture and the filling....and you could probably cut out more if your



heart desires.....



xo

74 comments:

Julie said...

I agree with so much of your post! My oldest is so much like me. I hope when we get through this parenting thing she wants to be besties (the rest of my kids too). :) My mom was totally my person.

Super super cute pics!

xo

BonjourRomance said...

What a touching post! You are so fortunate that your mother is also your best friend! My mother was mine (my father too, I was doubly blessed). Oh those fabulous talks and laughs my mom and I shared...there is nothing on earth like it! They are both in heaven now but someday we'll be swapping stories again! Your daughter is a lucky little girl, and a real cutie!

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

I also want to have a very close and best-friend relationship with my little crumb!

Exceptional post as usual...and I love how you always bring it back around and seal it with the perfect kiss!

Florence said...

Cherish every moment with your daughter, I have three and they are all married and I think we are probably even closer now that they are adult women. Thanks for sharing your story. Florence

Julie Harward said...

I enjoyed your thoughts about mothers and daughters. I agree with you about sharing all the deep things with just your mom..thats wise. My daughters are my "best" friends...I treasure that. Loved the recipe..so good! The picture of you and your daughter...very beautiful...she will treasure that!
Come say hi :D

Cathi said...

My daughter and I are great friends too...she is 18 now and it hasn't always been easy - but it's rewarding to see your child grow up into such an awesome human being...I also have a son, who I am great friends with too. I will agree though, that girls are tougher, at least it has been in my house. My daughter is exactly like me and sometimes she will just look at me and say " I just realized that I am just like you" Of course I tell her how lucky she is...which she sometimes rolls her eyes and sometimes doesn't...I'll take what I can get...haha...Great post and I love the recipe, thanks!

FEDERICA said...

Really a lovely post, I love these pics.
Have a sweet day!

vicki archer said...

Being a mother is the best and the the worst, it's the hardest and the easiest, it's the most tiring and the most energizing. A mother is always wrong even when she is right, always needed when everything is wrong and never needed when all is right.

It is the toughest thing I have ever done but I would not change one single moment I have spent with my children and I could not imagine a life worth living without them.

And as for the differences between daughters and sons.....they both have their 'cute' moments ;)

A lovely post Kasey and I do hope my girls speak about me the way that you so lovingly talk about your mother....That is what makes being a mother all so worthwhile, xv.

Jacqueline @ HOME said...

My daughter is 28 now and she tells me NEARLY everything...don't think I want to know everything !!!! The one thing I hate to hear people say is that their daughter is their best friend. I don't think that you should be that....you should be their parent...You can still have a close relationship....
Thanks for the book review. I'm going to see if I can get it here in the U.K. for my great niece.

Ashley said...

A mother-daughter friendship is unlike any other you will ever have. Cherish it... I do ;)

I know I've told you this before but your kiddo's are GORGEOUS!!!

<3

Martha said...

That book sounds terrific...I will definitely have to remember that...just beautiful and gorgeous post Kasey...{love the pics too}!

Zita - Mlle Magpie said...

Those first two photos of you and Lola are fantastic! Must frame, Kasey.

Jen Kershner said...

Emma and I love that book also! Girls are tough. Although for me and Maddie it didn't get tough until she was about 13. She and I are also very much alike. I'm hoping it will be easier with Emma. I look forward to being friends with my girls when they are grown but as a girl who grew up with a best friend when what I needed was a mom, I know it's best that I save that for later. I try to find a balance of being there to listen and give advice and to be fun and silly but always make sure they know I'm MOM not their buddy. We all just do the best we can. Right?

paige said...

just beautiful my friend~

christy jo said...

Lola, I mean Kasey, let me know how to ride the fence of being both a parent and friend. I think that's the key to being a successful parent, however, it must be a very tough task to accomplish. I find I am more on the parent side than the friend side because I've noticed my daughter (7)withholds a lot of info from me---I want her to be completely open with me!!! It bothers me because obviously I am not responding the way I should!

adrienne said...

parenting my 10 year old daughter is hard too. stubborn. stubborn. just like i am (was). but a lot sassier than i was. i think (hope) if you can be a parent first, you can be a friend later. way later. i'll say a prayer for all the moms and daughters!

Michelle Hughes said...

Oh I love that book. My husband did too. Way too long to read to our little mischief maker since he he only one and I can barely get him to sit still for The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Great photos! She is a doll!

Smiles!
Michelle

Preppy Mama said...

Thanks for sharing. I too am very stubborn and hard headed and my son, my first born is me (in the male form). He can push my buttons like no other and his favorite phrase right now is "Mommy you're a mean girl". (He hates it when I say NO!). My mom is my best friend and it took us years to get there, but I don't know what I would do with out her and she is the best secret keeper. I don't have daughters and the only reason that saddens me is that I will not have the relationship I have with my mom.

Diva Kreszl said...

Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt post! As the mother of grown children I can tell you that the way to a good adult relationship begins during childhood. Yes you must remain a parent but it's okay to let your children see that you make mistakes, that you can and do say I'm sorry and that you always keep the lines of communication open. They will grow up to be strong adults capable of admitting a mistake and realizing that it is possible to learn and move on. Your children are precious...thank your daughter for the book reccomendation!

Lisa said...

What a beautiful post!

Michelle, All Home and Love said...

I'll definitely check that book out. The recipe, well, I can't make any promises. I did make brownies from a box last night, my kids were thrilled. As if it was the first time they had ever seen homeade brownies in our house, so sad.
Love that last pic!
~Michelle

traci said...

what a beautiful post kasey. just wait until she's 19 1/2 and just like you. i have to get my hair colored today because of it. you got lots of time to prepare or pack your bags. i just went to the cabin with some girlfriend (one of whom just lost her 19 year old son) - we shared so much - lots of feelings and thoughts that we have never shared before. we did tons of crying and laughing and hugging. i feel so much closer to these girls now. it's amazing. so i guess i am saying it ok to share the dirt - with the right friends!!!

stacy di said...

great post.

isn't it amazing to look at your kids and see yourself?! amazing and horrifying...

my relationship with my daughter has developed and changed over the years {she's 13, so that goes without saying!!}...

ps. that apple crisp recipe looks yummy too :)

Lettered Cottage said...

Awesome post!
Thanks for sharing that recipe too...sounds YUMMY!

Off to go buy that book now....

:-)
Layla

truly blessed said...

Can I have the recipe for the enchiladas too? :) With that said...I so agree that parenting is HARD. Finding the balance between friend and parent is difficult. All we can do is give it our best. If that means cooking more for you, then go for it! My family loves a good meal. It makes them feel special and I feel good giving it to them. Not that days of Mac n Cheese are gone. You need the boxed stuff to make you appreciate the stuff from scratch. :)
xo
p.s. love the photos

Wendy said...

Hi Lady! Loved this post. I want that close kind of relationship with my daughter as well. It takes work. But, like you, I want to be her "go-to" girl!

Thanks for the recipe!

Have a great day!!

Simply Me Art said...

Lola B will be your Biggest Journey in your life. She is a mini version of you, so you are raising yourself in a way. Your Journey will follow many paths, stay close to her, she will want to wonder off that path once in a while but I'm sure you will be there to steer her back. She is her own little person and as she blossoms and figures that out the Journey will lead to little small journey's but in the end you will both end up in the same place just like you are your Mom now! She is a Doll and her Journey will be long. xo, Jamie (raising a girl is the hardest thing I've ever done or will do)

Andrea Villarreal said...

Raising girls is so hard! Not when Lindsay was little but now!! Oh my:) But we get thru everyday. We have gone thru the packed suitcase (age 10)cut her own hair (age 12)I am the worst mom ever (age 14) and can I borrow a sweater (now). Had I known how hard it was going to be perhaps I wouldn't have wished so much for a girl;) No I still would have. But I will say this they do need extra mom time more than boys. She really needs that time and so do I. Because she talks alot!! Kinda like her mom....

Anonymous said...

I love your blog and wanted to share an easy recipie with you...
put a roast in a crock pot (I usually just buy what is one sale), a can of beef broth, a can of beer and a can of french onion soup and then let it cook for 8 hours. shread the meat serve on toasted buns and you have amazing french dips!

Jboo said...

Beautiful post, great photos! Your girl looks like a lot of fun. Mothers and daughters -- so special!

Janet

Ali said...

Beautiful post Kasey. I have such a close and cool relationship with my son and when I had a little girl I hoped that it would be the same. I think that mothers and daughters have a more complicated relationship. It will be interesting to see how our relationship develops once she is out of the baby stage. I think that the relationship you described with your mom sounds wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing the apple crisp recipe. I am going to have to try it sounds yummy! Have a wonderful day!

Shannan Martin said...

I'm so the same as you - so private, sometimes to a fault. But I'm learning and I'm improving. It's funny to think of people like "us" being bloggers. It's all about the control, baby. :)

Your daughter is such a little honey. And it seems she's got some serious spunk, just like mine. Yikes.

a.love said...

i love hearing your heart :) i believe we're both on a little miraculous journey of our own to try and figure out how to make our house a better home.
you are a wonderful mom from the things you have shared here and with me, i just hope you hold that in your heart!

Nozomi said...

Hi, Kasey!
I think your girl is already that girl...who is sharing the ugly :) Well, I have 3 of those..so it is all good and normal, right? Always love your pictures! And LOVE your office...so LUCKY...

Grapefruit said...

Kate DiCamillo is one of my favorite authors. Have you read her new book? It's wonderful.

My daughter and I are the same. So similar, yet we struggle at times too. I know someday it will all pay off, and it will taste sweeter than I ever imagined!

Great photos! Do you really live with all those beautiful leaves around you? All that color? I'm SO jealous. I wish!

Jackie said...

We love that book too! My daughter is very much like my very feisty grandma (who I adore), it can be interesting (in a good way). Great pictures!!

Angie said...

GREAT photos and message- I have recently figured out that my daughter is ME as well. Not easy to battle yourself.

Unknown said...

LOVE those photos! Recipe sounds delish! Maybe i'll try it this weekend! :)

Leah C said...

Did you come to my house for a visit and I didn't know it? Because you just described my oldest daughter & me! Parenting girls is hard...so much drama...and, because I'm a girl, too...well, you know. Really know.
I miss my mom so much; I could tell her anything. I hope my daughters feel the same about me; and when they are adults, that I'm one of their best friends, too:) Beautiful thoughts, Kasey. Thanks for sharing...love those photos:)

luckygirlgifts said...

Thank you for sharing. Both, your recipe and your heart.
Your daughter is very, very, lucky, so is your mom.
It's so nice to see how much you appreciate your mother, and how much you cherish your daughter.
And hey, at least you are aware, and making a conscious effort.
How many parents don't even try, they just throw in the towel the first time their kid talks back saying "after all I do for them this is how I get treated". Don't get me wrong, I say that all the time but I don't stop trying, and neither do you. And, that is really all we can do.
You rock.

PS~Erin said...

Ah, the complexities of the mom/daughter relationship. I think about it everyday, praying that I'm not squelching what could be by my parenting. I want to grow an adult who loves and respects and wants to stay close with me. Such a tricky, beautiful, confusing little journey we're on.

You pictures are so very beautiful!

Unknown said...

You are rather private, now that I think of it...but you're also wonderful...so stick with it and I'm just sure Lola will want to be your best friend at some point here. Girls are rather tough to parent!

Really fabulous pics!!!

:) T

paige said...

ps
after seeing so many your photos continue to blow me away,
i'm thinking you might need to reconsider the ole " i don't really have many pictures out in our home" mantra.
just sayin...

that top one
good grief goreous

Melissa said...

What a great post! I lost my mom a couple years ago, she had a beautiful way of being both my best friend and mother all at the same time. The apple crisp sounds delicious. thanks for sharing =)

Marci @All Things Wonderful said...

Wow! I love this post. I always enjoy your blog. Thank your always inspiring. Lovely photos.

Tracy ~Seeking Refinement~ said...

love it. the mother-daughter relationship is so peppered with love-hate. So natural. I am encountering things that I thought we'd have to go through in the pre-teen years......sigh.....

i LOVE the shots of you and Lola with all the fall leaves, the suitcases....LOVE them. (can't even see the gray's, by the way....)

um, those rotisserie enchiladas sound delish. you just might have a cooking blog after all.... ;0

xoxo

*The Beautiful Life* said...

What a great post (as always) and GREAT pics!

I can't imagine Lola thinking of you as anything BUT her go-to gal when she needs one. :)

You rock, Kasey -- as a blogger, a friend, a as a MOM! :)

Ruth

Brenna LaPray said...

Love this post! You and Lola look beautiful. The pictures look great. Thanks for the recepi.

T said...

Kasey you are so truly blessed to have that kind of relationship with your mom. I know that you will have that with Lola too. Truly, truly a blessing.

paperbird said...

My daughter and I are both Scorpios and we butt heads a lot. I see so much of me in her sometimes it is eerie!
You and your daughter are beautiful people and us people love the miraculous journey of Edward Tulane- great book- I thought about getting Julia Childs book but then I thought twice!

Destri said...

I gave birth to a little girl last year...I never thought I would...maybe because I was so scared to death to raise one I wanted to believe that. Now I spend my days wondering what I ever would have done without her. Thank you Kasey, now I know I am not the only one...

Creations by Marie Antoinette and Edie Marie said...

Hello Kasey,
I'm so glad you are close with your daughter. My daughter Alexia,is 36, and She tried me seceral times,nothing serious,just teen stuff.You get though it. My daughter and I do everything together. She is the one who started my blog for me.She's my world.
Your daughter is so precous.She is going to be a true beauty when grown.You are a beauty too!!!
XXOO Marie Antionette

Rachel~Wildflower Photography Studio and Wildflower Creative said...

Beautiful pics! LOVE the colors! Thanks for the recipe too...I shall try it soon. ;)

Smiles,
rachel

Anonymous said...

Dear Lola,
I love saying your name so much we named our cat Lola~ I have a daughter close your age and we are always looking for good books to read. Thank you for sharing your favorite with Maddy and I. We will have to read it and get back with you on how we liked it. I wish you and your Mom lived closer to us because we would have so much fun together. Daughters are the best Lola and I know your Mom loves you to bits...just like I love Maddy. {{{hugs to you girlies}}} Susie and Maddy~

jules said...

you know what, i have a step daughter that was already raised by the time i met my husband. together we have two boys...he says that girls are a bit more challenging to raise...i will never know that from experience. my 13 year old son said to me the other day, after his 16 year old "girl" cousin had a friendship melt down, "mom, girls can say things that hurt your soul, boys...they just punch each other and it is over with". wise boy...i know from being a "girl" that it is not easy...there can be some drama...but it is so fun!!! love your post, jules

Mikal said...

The most ADORABLE photos and story! My daughter often made me wonder what I did in my life to cause God to "bless" me with her... I was sure it was nothing that bad! She is an angel, and the person that makes me smile the most now. (Plus I made her take her little brother school clothes shopping just for a taste of her own medicine!) Days may be challenging, but you will laugh about it in the future.

Can't wait to make the Apple Crisp for my boys at home.

Mikal

Suzanne : : S.HOPtalk said...

I literally have goose bumps because I can relate soooo well to everything in this post...kindred spirits my friend. I'm thinking good thoughts for both of us and our girlies!

LuLu said...

I pray every day over my relationships with my daughters. My first born is her father.... the way they think, humor, smarts, praticle... trying to find my spot in her life right now is wrenching my heart... i just have to stand back,parent her and wait for her to come to me..
i'm trying to be better in the kitchen,keep you posted on how well it goes,
xo,
LuLu

The Flying Bee said...

Love the pictures of you and Lola, I feel the love you have for her...this was a beautiful post.

I am going to try your yummy recipe...the boys will be thrilled!

Oh, and you're welcome...I meant it! :)

xo,
Adrienne

Jo said...

I just had to giggle at this post! My mother use to tell my brother and I that she hoped we would both have children just like ourselves ~ well, we did; exactly!

Jo

Suzann said...

Mother - daughter relationships are difficult.

Love the recipe!!

Kathy's Red Door Welcome said...

Mother-daughter relationships may be difficult, but so worth the work. It looks like you have a great relationship with your own mother, which is the best foundation and role model for your own daughter. I have raised three daughters and I must tell you that sometimes I think I gave birth to my deepest longings. I adore the photo of your daughter a top those suitcases, simply fabulous!

Dolce Baci said...

Adorable photos!!

monirose said...

oh Lola, beautiful post.

My own little Clare is only 10 months old, but I cannot wait for her to grow up and be bff's with her!

Also, absolutely love photos! Love the trunks :)

Liz Harrell said...

Truly stunning pictures. And I WANT your hair. It's the exact length I've been trying for. So hard not to cut it though. :)

Unknown said...

it's funny cause my daughter will do something and maybe i'll want to say something and i realize that she is me minus 30 years.....funny how that happens. sweet post. xo

Laura said...

your daughter is so much cuter than mine
is that so awful to say?
mothers every where are talking about me now
I know it
I mean, my kid is cute...
beautiful, really
but her style?
hmmm
it is different
and she doesnt brush her hair


drives me a little crazy
she is SO me
and yet
SO NOT
all at the same time

tricky it is,the mother daughter thing

Laurel said...

Ohhhh those suitcases....
I need a few more and you obviously have an abundance, can I barrow a few?

Lola looks so beautiful and happy. You're such a present parent and you should be proud of that. Present and aware.

Sounds like the kind of mom I'd love to have.

Alyssa said...

those photos are priceless! you guys are adorable :)

littlebyrd said...

That looks like a sweet book. Very cute pics of you tow girls :)

Chablis said...

Gorgeous pictures!! My oldest is exaclty like me too, it is sometimes the most humiliating thing. But also really amazing. :) I've missed you - it's been too long since I stopped by!

Tiffany said...

Oh, those pictures are gorgeous, Kasey! Love them. My daughter is only 3 but I am constantly thinking about our relationship. My Mom and sisters say she acts just like me. It is definitely hard to raise a girl, I have already experienced that in the short time I have had her. I just take it one day at a time and pray for a happy result in the end! : )

Amanda said...

Such cute pictures

Marci said...

i have a almost 18 yr old {gasp and lump in my throat} that is a lot like me in the same ways that lola is like you. stubborn, hard headed... i have to tell you this~she is one of my best friends and vice-versa. she hates me some days because i am also the mom. the key for me has been to always listen. even if it seems so dumb and inconsequential to you...it may be the most important thing in her life at the moment. that is honestly the thing i will miss the most when she goes off to college next year {tears}, the stupid ramblings of my girl everyday. the other important thing...be home when she gets home from school. most of the talking goes on in those first few minutes after school. there you go, some advice from a mom that's almost through with the teenage years and it's on to the adult woman she's soon to be.