white buttons...

My life as a mother .

As i sit here writing...i realize that about 95 percent of you stay at home with your children....and about 3 percent of you work outside the home....then there is the remaining 2 percent of you that don't even have children yet...but still read my blog.

There are two ways to mother......by being a stay at home mother...and by being a working mother.

I myself.....obviously......stay at home at the moment......but i do work......inside the home.....but my work ....does not just include raising my children......i have an online shop.....i also host an occasional sale....and i write this blog.....

which i feel takes up a ton of time due to the amount it takes to edit all my photo's and to put my thinking cap on...then hash it all out to you.

What you don't know about me is that i grew up with working parents..... I grew up with a beautiful person...who took care of me...named Gabina...she moved in with us when i was 18 mo. old and my brother was 2 mo. old.

Gabina raised us.

She spoke only spanish.......never learning a word of english.....though we all knew she understood english..........though my brother and i always spoke fluent spanish whenever we spoke to her.

Gabina lived with us till the day we both graduated high school....and still lived in the house even once my parents retired and moved out of the state.

A little over two years ago she passed away from stomach cancer.

My brother and i were lucky enough to be able to drop everything and fly to California to see her in hospice before she died. When we walked in.....it had been a little over 5 years since i had last seen her.

I had driven down from San Fransisco when Mason was just a week old to meet her....this lady that had raised me.

Sweet Gabina.

My mom is and will always be my mom....and my best friend......but Gabina is who raised me...and who i remember whenever i think back to certain childhood memories.

That doesn't make my mom a bad parent....because she worked.....and i turned out o.k. for having a working mom.

My mom just knew that she never wanted to stay home....not that she couldn't stay home....because she could have....but she just didn't.

Just because my parents were career driven......they {or at least my mom....because my dad was on the police force...} sat down with us every night for dinner...and weekends were full of family activities.

I love my mom.....and i miss Gabina terribly.

I would love to have a Gabina for my family.....but i don't.

I love my children so much.....but at times.....i wonder if i would be a better parent if i was not at home.....but i am.....and we will make it the best we can.

Which brings me to this.

I was actually reading an article in the Sunday paper which talked about parenting style.....and the view of a particular style called "hands-off" parenting.

These are the parents that let their children ride their bikes outside unsupervised.....or let their kids deal with circumstances...by themselves instead of getting involved...{of course ...getting involved when necessary}.

I have a bit of the "hands-off" philosophy in my blood i guess.......

weird...i know.

I actually let my kids work things out themselves.....

they take the bus to school.....

they walk home by themselves from the bus stop.....

and yes....sometimes......nevermind.

So....last Friday after my yard sale.....and after Mason had caught a frog at the pond....we headed to my favorite little store....Trader Joe's.

If you don't know what a Trader Joe's is....it's a petite organic grocery store...that also sells fabulous wine..and flowers.

I use the word petite because if you had in your mind something like a Target or a Walmart....then that would not be justified in the description.

Anyways.....

We got to T.J.'s and because it was hot out....we decided to NOT leave the frog in the car ....i don't care for fried frog......so we brought it with us in it's little tupperware of water.

As we were walking in.....I thought better of the situation and decided to have the kids .....this being just mason & lola {fin was not with us}....to wait outside of T.J.s.

I had them sit next to the huge pile of watermelons sitting outside the front door.

I know what you are thinking......who puts their kids next to a vat of watermelons unattended....right?

I did.

And i went inside to grab my wine and flowers.

I was only in there a few minutes....before a lady comes up to me and says....

are those your children outside........

hmmmmm... i thought to myself......do i answer "no" and continue on...?

so.....being the good mother that i am...i said "yes"....all the while thinking of watermelons all over the parking lot.

Then the lady says to me......I work for CPS* .....and you cannot leave your children outside a store unattended......

I swear she only came up to me because i was in the wine section quickly filling up my cart.......had i been in the fruit section...picking out organic apples...then she probably would have walked on by.

She then stated that it was a good thing today was her "day off".....otherwise she would have to write me up.

WRITE.ME.UP

I think what she meant was ....take a tablet out of her purse and write my name down on it...with a description that said something like.....

.LEFT.KIDS.OUTSIDE.WITH.FROG.

that's what i'm assuming.

and she DID NOT think it was very funny when i said.....It's a good thing i didn't leave them in the car then.

NOPE.

she did not.

So...i parked my cart full of wine and flowers.....trekked out and got my children who were still in the same spot next to the watermelons....and brought them back in with me.

I could have hung my head in shame....

but i did not....

i continued on....

like any normal mother would.....

Needless to say....the frog ended up dying later that day.......

Anyways....two completely seperate stories going on here.....but the point is....

we mother how we mother....there might be some up's and down's.....

but we are who we are.

xo

{oh!!! necklace winner is Paige...and if you decide to tell me what a horrible parent i am...then i re-gift the necklace.....}

*child protective services